We use words every day. It’s how we communicate with the people in our lives, but it’s also how we communicate with ourselves. What if I told you that the words you’re using can actually affect the results you’re getting in your daily life. In today’s post we’re gonna talk about how important it is to be mindful of the words you use, how you’re speaking to yourself, and the lens that you’re viewing life through. How we want to be speaking life into ourselves. Especially if you’re wanting to create a more aligned life.
If you are wanting to create a life of alignment, then you have to start speaking life into yourself. Into the life that you are creating. Into the life that you want.
Think of your brain as your very own hype man. Whatever you tell it, its going to believe. If you are only focusing on what is not possible, then the brain is going to say “you’re right” and it is going to focus on all the ways this is not possible. Its going to bring up all of the memories that remind you as to why you shouldn’t even try.
And yet there is this part of you that wants to live in alignment so badly. But you are having a hard time because you are constantly looking at the glass half empty. I do not believe in toxic positivity. I believe every feeling has its purpose and emotions are there because we are feeling something within our body. But when the default is to look at things negatively. Then you will never try.
You want your default to look at the glass half full. Trust me, I used to be the biggest pessimist. I am a virgo sun and moon. I am constantly analyzing and seeing what could be better, what needs to be fixed. The thing is, there is always going to be something that needs to be fixed. Something can always be better. And really, its about trying to have control. When everything around you feels unstable, we often try to control everything else in our lives. But the control is an illusion. Because at the end of the day, we often don’t know how something is going to turn out.
All of the constant worrying . The anxiety stemming from lack of control or perfectionism. What does that do? Nothing, but make you feel dysregulated. You are in constant fight or flight mode. You have to choose to start looking at all the ways in which things could go right. . I know its a lot easier said than done. And in the beginning it is going to be so hard for you to switch over. But if you are unhappy. If you are tired of being anxious. Then you have to be willing to do things differently.
You have to be fair and look at the positive and look at all of the things that could go right. When your brain is spiraling about things. I want you to stop and acknowledge your mind. “Yes. mind, you are right, thank you for the reminder. That is definitely something to consider. And what are the ways this could go right?”
When was there a time that you worried about something and everything came out fine? When you worried for nothing? I am sure you can come up with a lot of examples. Think about those times when you start spiraling about something.
Maybe you don’t even feel like this is possible for you. That you could ever stop worrying or have your anxiety under control. Well I’m here to tell you, that it is possible. But its a choice that you have to make for yourself. You have created this habit in how you are thinking. And the great thing about habits is that you can always create a new one. And looking at the glass half full can be a new mindset shift that can help everything in your life start falling into place.
So what is it that you have been wanting to do, but you have been talking yourself out of? What new way of being, or doing things has popped up in your mind? Maybe you had a random thought that you want to write a book.
Maybe it doesn’t feel like its in alignment because it seems so out of character for you. But I want you to start listening to those little whispers. Those little nudges. Those little inkling of wow that would be cool to do that. Or be like that. Or live my life like that.
Because there is a part of you, whether your realize it or not, that is that. Its a part that maybe you don’t recognize in yourself, YET. But your subconscious knows.
You have to speak life into the things that you want into yourself. Be kind to yourself. Uplift yourself. Day dream about the life that you want in a positive light. Don’t focus on the how you are going to make this work. Focus on how you would like to feel. How you would react in a certain situation. How good you would feel about it afterwards.
Your brain likes positive reinforcement. Anything that is negative. It is going to stop you in your tracks by convincing you not to try. Because it likes simplicity. It likes to not have to use too much energy. It likes to feel good.
I understand this could be hard in the beginning. You may not be able to look past your current circumstances. But here is the thing, you are not your circumstances. You may have created them, but you are not them. And just like you created them, you can create new ones.
I remember when I was on a debt pay off journey and I was trying to get everything paid off so that I could start putting money towards savings. I had just paid off my car and a few other things. So I was really excited to start saving the extra cash. Well guess what, soon after my car had some unexpected repairs that needed to be fixed . On top of that, my laptop at the time stopped working. I remember how upset and defeated I felt. I had worked so hard and here were more expenses.
The entire time I was paying towards these new expenses, I was so angry and bitter about it. What do you think that did for me? It really made me feel terrible. I was so angry at life and that I had to pay for this. Literally the entire time, I was so mad about it. And guess what happened. I paid it off. So all of that wasted energy, on something that worked out anyway. Yes maybe it did suck that i had to pay this. But I had a car that could get me to the money. I also had a brand new laptop.
I use this as a reminder whenever I start worrying about how something is going to turn out. Because it was such wasted energy. And everything worked out fine. I made the decision that I wanted to live a life full of trust and knowing that things will always work out for me. At the time, it felt so unrealistic because my default was looking at the glass have empty. But once I made the decision that this was going to be my new default way of thinking, I started putting it into practice. I go back to that memory, whenever I am feeling unstable. And it was helped me so much.
So how can you start doing this for yourself
1. Affirmations.
I know that there is a lot of differing opinions about affirmations. But they have helped me so much in my journey. Listen to them every morning. while you are getting ready if you can. The brain absorbs them most right after waking up or right before you are falling asleep. When your mind is at its most relaxed state. But you can listen to them whenever. You do not have to repeat them. You can just listen to them. Make it a habit.
- You can record yourself saying them and listen to them.
- There are so many videos on youtube with different affirmations depending on what it is you would like to work on. I have been listening to one from Abraham Hicks for years.
If you are really having a hard time with this, then you can use words like “I am learning to…, I am choosing to…”.
2. Mirror Work
When you look in the mirror, say something positive to yourself. They are sort of like affirmations, but in the mirror. This may be hard at first. But if you are not going to say something nice, don’t say anything at all.
Words are powerful and they take form and affect you in ways you do not realize. You can start out by telling yourself, “Good job doing x, I really didn’t want to do x, but I did it anyway. Thank you for showing up for yourself and doing x. Good job today!”
No comparison, no nothing, just a good job.
Once you are comfortable with that, then you can move on to the ‘You are’ statements, “you are a good person, you are smart, you are capable.” And then eventually, you will be able to use ‘I am’ statements, I am worthy, I am lovable, I love myself.”
Speak life into yourself. Uplift yourself, like you would a friend. Give yourself the validation you need.
3. Let go of Perfection
Learning to speak kindly to yourself and about the things you are creating is a practice. You will have good days and bad days. Maybe one day you were not able to do things as well as you would have liked to and that is ok. Did you try? Did you have it in you that day?
Remember you are human and growth is not linear.
Just show grace and self compassion. Stop beating yourself up for little things. You can always start again. Soon you will be living your life in the way that you have always wanted. And all it took was for you to start looking at yourself and life through a more positive lens.
If you are ready to start speaking life into yourself and you are wanting support in finding what your aligned life looks like, lets hop on a call. I would love to support you on this journey of self discovery.Click here to hop on a discovery call.
